Greetings & Such...

I've had this blog for almost a year, but never got around to posting anything. I just didn't know how to start. Not so much what to post but how to begin justifying wasting as much time as I did before finally succumbing to the fact that I need to try to make a go for Medical School.

I felt foolish to say the least. I'm in my mid thirties (35 to be precise), I've been a home maker for almost a decade, and I have no college degree--I'm literally starting from scratch. I have been going to my local college for the last 4 years...I mean to be fair, it has been on and off and on a part-time basis. Besides, when I started taking classes, it was never my intentions to go pre-med. I started out taking classes to apply to a nursing program. My second semester in, while taking Anatomy and Physiology, I had an epiphany as I dissected a sheep's brain; I want to know more. I need to know more. I want medicine. See, my whole foolish thinking was that I have no time. Even when I was 19, I felt I didn't have enough time. The honest truth is that I have suffered with immense guilt (then and somewhat now) over my selfish desires. I want to be a doctor when I grow up :)

Before you ask, yes I have considered the Physician Assistant route...and I even tried to use that career to substitute for the fact that I missed my chance at medical doctor, but it didn't work. Physician Assistant is a great role and I believe that we are going to see more of them in the very near future, because they are needed and play a vital role in the health care field. But I've decided that if I'm going to spend a total of 7 years in school to become one, then what difference does 11 or 12 years mean to a person like me? Virtually uneducated with just a GED and crappy Medical Assistant certificate that I've had since I was 19. I refuse to wake up 10 years from now, wondering yet again, how far would I have been? I could have been practically done by now.

It won't be easy. The odds are something fierce but at this point I don't care. I can't take my needling sub-conscious anymore. My resolve is firm. I may fail but this is something that I HAVE to do for me. If I fail, it will suck! but at least I know that I went for it with everything I had.

~Surly